A lot of people do not realize that blame and criticism are the number one relationship destroyers and when Gay and I first got together, we actually made a commitment to each other that we would simply stop blaming and criticizing because we saw that it is actually kind of an addiction when you blame and criticize. What happens in your body is that you get a rush of adrenaline, you get this kind of ha ha ha, moment of glee. And the pay off for blaming and criticizing is you get a moment of feeling that you are right, and that moment is incredibly addictive.